ok, today i feel slightly depressed, only slightly. i remind myself of my difficulty ( compulsive disorder ) to never allowing myself to become or return to, being blissfully ignorant, i need to find out more and more, it doesn’t mean i know everything, it just means i want to find out about everything, to the point of distraction .. i don’t mention this lightly, nor do i want to trivialise depression or even seek sympathy from you dear reader. as i’ve proudly claimed before, i regularly, well in fact, incredibly actively, seek news like a junkie looking for gratification at the tip of a pipe, end of a needle or the absorption of a line. it has become the source of today’s melancholy. maybe that’s a better word for my feelings. i mean have you looked at the news lately ?
i insist on watching, reading, hearing and enduring such enormously dreadful things, that i think they are affecting my demeanour. i can’t belive that others around me are so blind, yes in my opinion !! .. not only do they not see the light, they remain calm. why can’t we all apply the necessary love, the compassion, or indeed just a little allowance for humans to co-exist. shit is it getting worse, or is it just that i’m reaching a higher plateau, a news category commonly described as a tragic heavy user ?
what can i do, see a film, read a book, ( i read a lot of detective, murder, forensic stuff – so maybe not ), watch television, well no, maybe not. my idea now is to go for a walk, smell the evil in the world outside, first hand.
although i rave on like this from time to time i realise that i just surf about, bobbing about on the the surface and luckily i’m reasonably sound and not likely to sink. i have two dogs who keep me sane, a bride who maintains my “low level of insane” for which i’m gladly happy and enough great music to keep my head shaking in a good way, pity about the attempts at dancing, but they’re kept very private.
so if for some reason you feeling blue .. and not the stupid morose toe gazing crap i’m going on about, here’s some good solid information, based in australia… google depression support if you’re elsewhere and you’ll find some solid advice.
here’s a cartoon to help tbaoo resume normal broadcasting ..