slightly blue{2}
ok, today i feel slightly depressed, only slightly. i remind myself of my difficulty ( compulsive disorder ) to never allowing myself to become or return to, being blissfully ignorant, i need to find out more and more, it doesn’t mean i know everything, it just means i want to find out about everything, to the point of distraction .. i don’t mention this lightly, nor do i want to trivialise depression or even seek sympathy from you dear reader. as i’ve proudly claimed before, i regularly, well in fact, incredibly actively, seek news like a junkie looking for gratification at the tip of a pipe, end of a needle or the absorption of a line. it has become the source of today’s melancholy. maybe that’s a better word for my feelings. i mean have you looked at the news lately ?
i insist on watching, reading, hearing and enduring such enormously dreadful things, that i think they are affecting my demeanour. i can’t belive that others around me are so blind, yes in my opinion !! .. not only do they not see the light, they remain calm. why can’t we all apply the necessary love, the compassion, or indeed just a little allowance for humans to co-exist. shit is it getting worse, or is it just that i’m reaching a higher plateau, a news category commonly described as a tragic heavy user ?
what can i do, see a film, read a book, ( i read a lot of detective, murder, forensic stuff – so maybe not ), watch television, well no, maybe not. my idea now is to go for a walk, smell the evil in the world outside, first hand.
although i rave on like this from time to time i realise that i just surf about, bobbing about on the the surface and luckily i’m reasonably sound and not likely to sink. i have two dogs who keep me sane, a bride who maintains my “low level of insane” for which i’m gladly happy and enough great music to keep my head shaking in a good way, pity about the attempts at dancing, but they’re kept very private.
so if for some reason you feeling blue .. and not the stupid morose toe gazing crap i’m going on about, here’s some good solid information, based in australia… google depression support if you’re elsewhere and you’ll find some solid advice.
here’s a cartoon to help tbaoo resume normal broadcasting ..
Sep 12, 2010 @ 19:01:32
Sorry to hear you're blue, Taboo. Understandably so. Whilst I dont believe this article necessarily applies to you, it does offer a different way of looking at things – both the way this world seems to be going (my initial search topic) and the dangers of indulging any sort of 'compulsion'. Again I say, obviously no comparison with your situation, but at worst, an explanation as to why some are able to remain 'calm' or choose 'blissful ignorance'. Perhaps they are not blind, but actually see the forest through the trees. Is it possible that as horrific and insane the world is becoming, it is not out of control, but following a predicted path to a foregone conclusion? Sorry, Taboo, not a very well thought out…thought, but the best I can offer with the 5 mins I have.
A word of advice: whilst it is comforting to know that there are those out there, like yourself, who spend so much time researching and considering the issues of life, it's not worth destroy yourself doing so. Maybe you would feel a little better if you took on a project that made the world a little better for someone
http://www.wake-up.org/daystar/ds2005/Nov.htm
twitter: tbaootweets
Sep 13, 2010 @ 04:05:44
thanks rebecca, i smiled when i saw the link at the bottom of the page, "wake up america" yes that's the problem, although i appreciate your link i don't think that's the solution.
i'm fighting the good fight for good now and not evil, even my walk around the block convinced me of that. please check out this post to gauge the change in attitude.
http://www.tbaoo.com/2010/09/12/a-new-playmate-is…